December

December indicates that the fall semester is going to end very soon. Of course, very busy in finishing schoolworks and preparing for the finals.

Going back to HK on 20th December. I'm so excited to go home since I miss the food a lot.:) Going to stay in HK for 3 weeks.

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday to myself! I am now an adult. Next month when I go back to HK, I will get a new I.D. (I must make sure that I won't take an ugly picture...)

P.S. Thank you very much for celebrating with me and the gift.:)

放棄

在Concerto Competition的前兩天, 我選擇了放棄這比賽, 因為我的樂曲還未準備好, 沒有把握去參賽。兩星期之前為準備另一個比賽, 沒有花很多時間在Rach Pag, 實則上我只有少於兩星期的時間去練好這樂曲, 很勉強地把整首樂曲背過來, 但是經常有memory slips, 表現很怯。老師認為參賽不是一件好事, 因為一般人在台上都會緊張, memory slips的情況必然會更嚴重, 彈得差, 自己覺得不開心, 評判也不好受, 最惨的是被評判記着。老師讓我自己作決定, 起初聽了老師的意見感到很失望, 但考慮了一段時間, 我覺得與其要在別人面前丟臉, 倒不如及早放棄, 我不想自己心裏留下陰影。另外, 不能參加這次比賽, 日後還有很多機會, 用心把Rach Pag練好, 作為下次比賽的參賽曲目。

從小到大未試過在比賽前放棄, 今次作出這決定需要很大勇氣, 傳了電郵給學校樂團的指揮, 之後倒是鬆一口氣, 過去兩星期一直都覺得好大壓力, 很努力練琴, 但心裏清楚知道自己未達到能夠參賽的水平, 現在沒有去參賽, 心情輕鬆了很多。其實, 棄權並沒有我想像中這般差, 每一個修讀演奏的人都很明白這感覺, 當你未準備好便要上台表演, 心裏承受着很大壓力, 雖然可能只需要彈十分鐘, 但那絕對會是一件很痛苦的事, 加上觀眾的注意力全都放在你一個人身上, 表現不好的心裏真是很難受。

比賽

星期日參加KMTA State Honors Audition, 得了Collegiate Freshman/Sophomore Piano第三名, 有一面銅牌, 第一次拿獎牌, 很開心。:P 過了KMTA要專心練Rachmaninoff Paganini Rhapsody, Rach Pag一直都學得很慢, 所以我決定報名參加學校的Concerto Competition來逼自己趕快把它練好, 比賽將會在下星期六舉行, 時間不多, 我必須「趕工」, 雖然比賽沒有要求背譜, 但是我一向覺得翻譜會分心, 所以我會盡量把整首樂曲背過來, 可惜Rachmaninoff的作品真是很難背...

另外, 這星期六會幫兩位師兄伴奏Rachmaninoff 2nd Piano Concerto 1st mvt., 要四個小時的車程才去到比賽地點。一向很喜歡Rach 2, 練Piano II的部分時哼着solo的旋律, 真是很想學這首Concerto, 將來一定要學Rach 2。

每次有比賽, 我都是非常不願意去上課, 只想專心留在department裡練琴。即使去了上課, 我腦海裡都是想着樂曲, 導師的講解我一句都聽不入耳。不過為了出席率, 還是要乖乖去上課=.=

粥

今早在學校吃早餐時, 見到有位韓國朋友在吃自備的「即食粥」, 她告訴我「粥」的韓文跟廣東話的讀音很相似。我沒有問她韓式的粥有什麼材料, 不過看着那碗粥, 我便很懷念我最愛吃的鹹瘦肉粥。這是我從小到大在粥鋪唯一會點的粥, 十七年多(快要十八年...)從沒有改變過, 間中會要皮蛋, 但一般情況下我都是要鹹瘦肉粥。去粥鋪我從來不會看餐牌, 因為我多年來都是獨沽一味, 根本從來沒有想過要點其他款式。

我很想吃鹹瘦肉粥...=.=

假期

時間過得很快, 這個學期原來已經過了一半。這個學期一點都不好玩, 原因是我讀太多學分, 我讀18個學分(最高限制是20), 很辛苦, 吸取了教訓, 下學期一定要讀少一些學分, 而且我打消了「三年半畢業」這念頭, 倒是計劃副修其他科目, 又或者讓老師幫我安排去德國一個學期當交換生, 前後一共讀四年半, 這樣我便可以在五月畢業, 對申請碩士課程較為方便。

之前fall break的時候生病, 四天的假期我都留在房裏休息, 我覺得自己白白浪費了一個假期, 所以很期待下個月的thanksgiving week, 我的生日是thanksgiving前兩天, 而媽媽會來Kansas跟我慶祝生日, 雖然不能在正日慶祝生日, 但是可以去Kansas City跟媽媽見面和去逛一逛, 我已經很滿足。媽媽着我有空的時候便想一下有什麼禮物想要, 還有想吃的食物。:D

Sick

The four-days fall break is over. I didn't feel like I had a fall break because I started to get sick at the night before the first day of holiday. I had severe headache, muscle ache through my whole body, and also fever. The pain stopped for a while occasionally, but most of the time I was suffering from the pain. I slept for almost two full days and then I felt a bit better on Saturday morning. However, in the afternoon I started to feel the pain again and my boyfriend drove me to the hospital.

I gave the nurse in the registration a hard time. As I was below 18 and I didn't have a parent or guardian in the USA, the registration procedure was slightly complicated. The nurse had to make calls to ask the administrative staff how to deal with my case. Later, they understood that I am an international student, so they just left the blank "Patient Parent/Guardian Signature" empty. They first checked my pulse, temperature etc. The reading of my pulse was 135 and the nurse was shocked. He checked it again and it was 137. I actually didn't realise that a 135 pulse was very high until I saw the light flashing on the screen of the machine. I was then sent to see a nurse practitioner. As they were worried that I had a flu, they drew my blood and some other my excretions to send to the lab. Thank god that the blood test was very successful this time. As Americans worked very slowly, it took more than 1 hour for the lab results to come out.

I called home while waiting. When I heard my mom's voice, I started crying like a little kid because I missed home a lot at that moment. My mom thought that I was scared but I explained that I just missed her a lot when I was sick. Mom replied, "Of course you miss home. You have been away from home for 2 months already. And you used to eat my food when you were sick. Now I'm not beside you to cook for you." I got homesick when I was sick...

At last, the lab result came out. The doctor said that I didn't have a flu, only viral infection. He then asked me if I have had any blood problems before as the blood test showed that both the white blood cells and blood platelets in my blood were low. It was unusual and he guessed that it was probably because of the virus.
As there were no medicines for viral infection, I could only take Tylenol and Advil for aches and temperature. I was asked to take quite a lot of pills - 2 tablets of Tylenol every 6 hours and 3 tablets of Advil every 6 hours. Since it's not very good to take 2 kinds of medicines at the same time, I took Tylenol and Advil alternately. That means first Tylenol, Advil 3 hours later, then Tylenol 3 hours later, so on so forth. As I had to maintain a regular intake of medicines, I had to wake up at the midnight to take the pills. I didn't get a very good sleep since I had to wake up every 3 hours.

I need to re-take blood test on Monday and no school on Monday and Tuesday.

怪人

在不少人眼中, 讀音樂的人都是「怪人」, 我也是其中之一, 我對"anti-social"、"socially awkward"這類字詞的感覺已經麻木了, 也不介意別人在背後這樣形容我。

我不會否認自己的社交生活少, 一來沒有這麼多時間, 二來我跟大部分香港學生話題不多, 也不太跟他們一起外出, 而美國朋友週末也不會有很多節目, 一般都是去教會和休息, 生活較為簡單。如果真是對音樂有熱誠, 修讀演奏的人的生活其實都是「無休」, 當然每個人花在練琴的時間都不同, 但我覺得練琴是每天都應該做的事, 練多少是另一回事, 但最少也要用少許時間去彈琴, 保持手部肌肉的狀態, 我間中會「偷懶」一天, 不過之後心裏總會有一份罪惡感, 而且雙手感覺好奇怪, 會感到自己有個動作沒有做, 那就是彈琴的動作, 我試過在乘飛機時在桌上或自己的腿上練習, 但感覺非常不舒服, 所以一定要在鋼琴上練習才有效。練琴是沒有練完的一刻, 現在你也許會認為自己的彈奏很完美, 但下一刻再彈同一首樂曲的時候, 你應該會找到可以繼續進步的地方。有時候朋友約我外出而我又拒絕, 他們會問：「練少一日唔駛死掛?」, 我只能無奈地微笑。

我不太擅於社交, 犬其是在一大群我不認識而又不懂音樂的人當中, 我會感到沒有什麼話可以講, 自然地我會當旁聽者, 我曾經逼自己嘗試講話, 不過聽到自己在胡扯一番, 我便覺得自己像個笨蛋, 倒不如保持沉默, 現在我會盡量找相熟的朋友一起去, 什至避免出席這類場合。我其實是可以很健談, 不過一般只有讀音樂的人才會認識到。

Lalo Symphonie Espagnole

Addicted to Lalo Symphonie Espagnole recently, especially the 1st mvt. I don't have the recording but it's not difficult to find videos on Youtube. Here is a video of the 1st mvt which I really like: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjuS4TJZ3ww

The soloist and I study at the same university. She is one of the best violinists at school. I will probably do some chamber music with her this semester. I am sure that I will learn a lot through working with her. Looking forward to it!

1 month

It has been almost a month since I updated here last time. Lots of things happened and there were quite many ups and downs, of course.

So glad that I still survive in my theory class. My theory professor's class is so intensive and it takes so much time to complete the assignments. I used to do very well in ear-training part but this semester I totally suck in it. The professor likes to use orchestral works or string quartets and then we are asked to dictate the soprano and bass line. I always fail to hear the bass line and I can't really analyse the harmony.

I started to slack off after the first few weeks of school. I have trouble in attending 8am class again. It's quite strange that I can stay up late to work but I never succeed in getting up earlier.

There is one Undergraduate Honors Recital every semester. The faculty of each division selects students to audition for the recital based on the performance in the jury exams of the previous semester. For piano division, the professors usually pick students of senior years instead of freshmen and sophomore. Surprisingly, I was nominated as the alternate student to audition for the recital. Yet, my professor didn't tell me about that and I didn't even care about the audition. The audition was held on Wednesday night and I suddenly got a call from my teacher on Sunday night. He said that someone had dropped out and he asked me if I wanted to take the place. Of course, the first question was "Will you have anything to play?". I remained silent for a few seconds. Then I answered, "Perhaps Liszt La Campanella?". Frankly, I still hadn't memorised the piece when I decided to play La Campanella as the audition piece. I had been working on the piece for more than 1 month but it wasn't very refined. There were only 3 days till the audition. I couldn't resist frowning and sighing after hanging up. At last, I managed to memorise the piece completely on Wednesday morning. Of course, I was nervous during the audition. At last, I couldn't get into it. I was a bit unhappy but the "results" were actually quite good. 3 out of 5 piano majors were chosen; 1 student of each professor's studio. Including me, there were totally 2 students of my professor's studio taking the audition for the honors recital. The other student is a senior and he plays well. There is no reason for the jury to choose me if they can select only 1 student from my teacher's studio. Besides, I have signed up to perform in a formal dinner organised by the alumni association at the same time of the Undergraduate Honors Recital. I can't do both performances. So, not being able to perform in the recital is not a bad thing.

I got my first job last Friday. It was sort of teaching and accompanying. My "student" was an eight-year-old cellist. She had problems on the rhythm and her mother wanted me to help her. Therefore, I taught how to get the rhythm and also, how to use a metronome, as well as accompanying the piece. As it was my firs time to "teach" a little kid, I was very nervous. And because I am a very picky person, I was worried that the little girl would feel unhappy and frustrated when I told her what she had to change or improve. Yet, her mom was glad that I gave so critical comments and she asked if I would have time to have a lesson next week. Of course, I was happy when she asked that. The little girl played very musically but the tempo spoiled everything. I would be happy to help her to deal with this problem though it's very challenging.

The contents in the post seems quite random. However, I really want to write about some special things that happened last month.

Timbre

Played 1st mvt of Mozart Piano Sonata No.8 in A minor, KV 310 in a masterclass this afternoon. Mozart wrote this piano sonata after his mother's death. He and his father were on a tour at that time and they couldn't go back on time to attend the funeral. Seriously, it is a very difficult piece. I had a hard time in getting into the music. My mother is still alive and at this moment, I can't totally understand the feelings. I tried my best to imagine how I would feel if my mom dies. Actually, I thought a lot about my mom after playing in the class. And I had a tendency to cry but fortunately, I managed to control my emotions.

The masterclass teacher was Carine Gutlerner who was an alumni of my school. She studied with my professor before. My playing was not extremely good but overall, it was fine. Carine's comment was "very sensitive; so refined". I was very surprised that she said "very sensitive" for quite a few times. She worked on the timbre (tone quality) and climaxes of the phrases with me. I really like her suggestions on the different kinds of sounds. What affects the timbre is actually the hand motions. A small difference on the hand movements can make a huge change. Well, I couldn't improve that right after Carine's demonstration. It just takes a long time to explore and master the skills on producing a good tone.

I am going to put the word "timbre" in my mind. I will always remember that.

Life

Damn busy since the first day of school.

I used to take only little time on theory music. However, this semester I am taking a professor’s class instead of a GTA's one. This professor's theory class is recognized to be very intensive. I find it very true. The assignments are very difficult.

It's so difficult to get a balance between practice and academic works. I'm so exhausted, both physically and mentally. But no matter how much homework I have, I still make practice as my first priority. Practice is endless and I don’t really want to leave the music department until I feel satisfied with the progress of the pieces. When I finally sit down to do my assignments or revise, it’s usually after 12 am. I usually work until 2am and then wake up at 6am. I actually don’t have to wake up so early every day because I only have 8am classes on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Yet, I want to make myself practise piano for a while before classes begin.

I am quite sad to look into the mirror every morning because my skin just keeps on getting worse.

Liszt Festival

上星期五, 鋼琴系有一個小型的會議, 系主任和幾位教授宣佈了來年有什麼特別的節目。

明年四月, American Liszt Society將會在我的大學舉行每年一度的Liszt Festival, 這festival將為期三日, ALS選了我學校作為活動場地, 原因之一是學校擁有Liszt生前最後一部鋼琴, 那部三角琴被存放在美術館, 而且負責籌備這活動的那位教授曾經跟著名鋼琴家Earl Wild學習, Earl Wild現年93歲, 他在浪漫時期作品的演繹很有名, 當中包括Liszt, 而ALS有意頒一個獎項給這位年老的鋼琴家。Liszt Festival將會是個各地的鋼琴家聚集的活動, 當然不能缺少演奏會, 教授希望可以由我大學的學生演奏全套Liszt Transcendental Etudes(超技練習曲), 這套一共十二首, 學校想選出十二位學生, 每人彈其中一首練習曲。Liszt的作品一向不會跟「容易」一詞扯上關係, 而Transcendental Etudes是非常難彈, 要用很多時間練習。我沒有學過任何一首Liszt Transcendental Etude, 但這個節目實在是非常吸引, 我覺得無論如何也應該嘗試一下。

Liszt Transcendental Etudes其中以No.8和No.10最多人彈, 偏偏我最愛No.10, 我也喜歡No.4, 不過No.10較短, 應該比較易掌握, 問題就是可能會有不少人爭彈這一首。

我要考慮一下選哪一首。No.4? No.10? 還是較為冷門的那些練習曲?

Fall term

Back to Kansas. Fall term will start tomorrow.

The trip back to the USA was fine. Since there were many international students on the flight, the economy class was overbooked. As I am a member of the premier silver card of this airline, I was upgraded to business class in the flight to Chicago. And I didn't have to pay money. The seats in the business class were much more comfortable but strangely, I couldn't sleep well on the plane. It was quite annoying some passengers sitting nearby snored really loudly.=.= It was so amazing that the flights were on time. This rarely happens. I didn't have to wait for a long time to get my luggage in Chicago airport.

I am going to live in the same hall for this school year. I live in a single room on a quiet floor. Other residents are not supposed to make loud noises that may disturb others.

This term is going to be very tough because I am going to take 19 credits (20 is the maximum). The subjects include Theory, Music History, German, Piano, Chamber Music, Violin and Piano Accompanying for dance. I wonder if I can still maintain high GPA.

隨想(三)

完成我想彈的樂曲的清彈......

P
Poulenc
1) Concerto for 2 Pianos & Orchestra in D minor, FP 61
2) Flute Sonata, Op.164

Prokofiev
1) Romeo & Juliet - 10 Pieces for Piano, Op.75
2) Toccata, Op.11
3) Piano Concerto No.2 in G minor, Op.16
4) Piano Concerto No.3 in C, Op.26
5) Piano Sonata No.2 in D minor, Op.14
6) Piano Sonata No.6 in A, Op.82
7) Piano Sonata No.7 in B-flat, Op.83
8) Overture on Hebrew Themes, Op.34

Q

R
Rachmaninoff
1) Piano Concerto No.1 in F-sharp minor, Op.1
2) Piano Concerto No.2 in C minor, Op.18
3) Piano Concerto No.3 in D minor, Op.30
4) Moments Musicaux, Op.16
5) 10 Preludes, Op.23
6) 13 Preludes, Op.32
7) Etudes-Tableaux, Op.33
8) Etudes-Tableaux, Op.39
9) Sonata for Cello & Piano in G minor, Op.19
10) Variations on a Theme of Chopin, Op.22
11) Vocalise, Op.34, No.14

Ravel
1) Miroirs
2) Gaspard de la Nuit
3) Jeux d'Eau
4) Piano Concerto in G
5) Piano Trio
6) La Valse (transcription for 2 pianos)
7) Tzigane

S
Saint-Saens
1) Piano Concerto No.2 in G minor, Op.22
2) Piano Concerto No.3 in E-flat, Op.29
3) Le Carnaval des Animaux (transcription for piano 4 hands)

Shostakovich
1) Piano Concerto No.1 in C minor, Op.35
2) Piano Trio No.2 in E minor, Op.67
3) Concertino for 2 pianos, Op.94
4) 24 Preludes & Fugues, Op.34

Scarlatti
1) Keyboard Sonatas (selected)

Schubert
1) Piano Sonata No.13 in A minor, D.845
2) Fantasie in F minor for piano duet, D.940
3) Quintet for Piano & Strings, D.667, "Trout"
4) Sonata for Arpeggione(or cello) & Piano in A minor, D.821

Schumann
1) Piano Sonata No.2 in G minor, Op.22
2) Symphonic Etudes, Op.13
3) Piano Concerto in A minor, Op.54
4) Carnaval, Op.9
5) Faschingsschwank aus Wien, Op.26
6) Violin Sonata No.1 in A minor, Op.105

Scriabin
- 不熟悉這作曲家, 不過一定會彈他的作品

Stravinsky
1) Sonata
2) 4 Studies
3) Piano Transcriptions from "Petrushka" & "The Firebird"

Sarasate
1) Carman Concert Fantasy, Op.25 (orchestra part)
2) Zigeunerweisen, Op.20 (orchestra part)

T
Tchaikovsky
1) Piano Concerto No.1, Op.23
2) Piano Concerto No.3, Op.75
3) The Seasons, Op.37a

U

V

W

X

Y

Z

(完)

隨想(二)

繼續列出我想彈的樂曲......

G
Ginastera
1) Suite de Danzas Criollas Op. 15
2) Piano Sonata No.1, Op.22

Gershwin
1) Rhapsody in Blue

Grieg
1) Piano Concerto in A minor, Op.16
2) Piano Sonata in E minor, Op.7

H
Haydn
1) Piano Sonata No.32 in B minor
2) Piano Sonata No.50 in C
3) Piano Sonata No.44 in G minor
4) Piano Sonata No.36 in C-sharp minor
5) Cello Concerto No.1 in C

Handel
1) Chaconne in G, HWV 435

I

J

K

L
Lalo
1) Cello Concerto in D minor
2) Symphonie Espagnole, Op.21

Liszt
1) Hungarian Rhapsodies Nos.2,11,12
2) Transcendantal Etudes Nos.4 & 10
3) "Un Sospiro" from 3 Concert Etudes
4) Piano Concerto No.1 in E-flat
5) Mephisto Waltz No.1
6) Concert Paraphrase by Rigoletto by Verdi
7) "Gnomenreigen" from 2 Konzertetuden
8) Schubert Song transcriptions "Erlkonig"
9) Liebestraume No.3

M
Mendelssohn
1) Piano Concerto No.1 in G minor, Op.25
2) Piano Trio No.1 in D minor, Op.49
3) Piano Trio No.2 in C minor, Op.66

Mozart
1) Piano Concerto No.20 in D minor, K.466
2) Piano Concerto No.21 in C, K.467
3) Piano Concerto No.24 in C minor, K.491
4) Piano Sonata No.14 in C minor, K.457

Mussorgsky
1) Pictures at an Exhibition

Muczynski
1) Desparate Measures (Paganini Variations)

Musto
1) Sextet for Clarinet, Two Violins, Viola, Cello & Piano

N

O

(續)

隨想(一)

某天晚上睡不着, 望着天花板想想自己有什麼曲目想獨奏、伴奏和合奏, 我發現自己原來很貪心, 哈哈。

按作曲家名字排序, 大概有以下這些作品:

A

B
J.S.Bach
1) Well-tempered Clavier I & II
3) Keyboard Concerto No.1 in D minor, BWV 1052

Barber
1) Piano Sonata, Op.26
2) Piano Concerto, Op.38
3) Excursions, Op.20

Bartok
1) Piano Sonata, Sz.80
2) Piano Concerto No.1, Sz.83

Beethoven
1) Piano Concertos Nos.2-5
2) Piano Sonata No.6 in F major, Op.10 No.2
3) Piano Sonata No.8 in C minor, Op.13, "Pathetique"
4) Piano Sonata No.11 in B-flat, Op.22
5) Piano Sonata No.23 in F minor, Op.57, "Appassionata"
6) Piano Sonata No.26 in E-flat, Op.81a, "Les Adieux"
7) Piano Sonata No.32 in C minor, Op.111
8) Fantasia for Piano, Chorus & Orchestra, Op.80
9) Sonata for Violin & Piano No.5 in F, Op.27, "Spring"
10) Sonata for Violin & Piano No.7 in C minor, Op.30, No.2
11) Sonata for Cello & Piano No.3 in A, Op.69
12) Triple Concerto, Op.56

Brahms
1) Piano Concerto No.1 in D minor, Op.15
2) 7 Fantasien, Op.116
3) 6 Klavierstucke, Op.118
4) Piano Quartet No.1 in G minor, Op.25
5) Piano Quintet in F minor, Op.34
6) Sonata for Viola (or Clarinet) & Piano No.2, Op.120, No.2
7) Sonata for Violin & Piano No.1, Op.78
8) Variations on a Theme of Paganini, Books I & II
9) Violin Concerto, Op.77

C
Chabrier
1) Bourree Fantasque

Chopin
1) 24 Preludes, Op.28
2) Piano Sonata Nos.2 & 3
3) Polonaise-Fantasie, Op.61
4) Andante Spianato et Grande Polonaise Brillante, Op.22
5) Ballade No.1 in G minor, Op.23
6) Ballade No.4 in F minor, Op.52
7) Nocturnes, Op.27
8) Piano Concertos Nos.1 & 2
9) Mazurkas, Op.33
10) Scherzo No.3 in C-sharp minor, Op.39
11) Scherzo No.4 in E, Op.54
12) Barcarolle, Op.60

D
Debussy
1) Estampes
2) L'isle Joyeuse
3) Images I & II
4) Sonata for Cello & Piano

Dvorak
1) Piano Quintet No.2, Op.81
2) Piano Trio No.4 in E minor, Op.90, "Dumky"
3) Cello Concerto in B minor, Op.104

E
Elgar
1) Elgar Cello Concerto in E minor, Op.85

F
Frank
1) Prelude, Chorale & Fugue
2) Cello Sonata in A

(續)

決定

上個月開完家庭會議, 考慮了一段時間, 還是選擇不轉校, 留待報讀碩士才報考音樂學院。

老父的想法也不是無道理, 一個人如果是有天份和勤奮, 不論是在一間名校或沒有名氣的學校, 他/她也可以很有成就, 名氣沒有什麼意思, 那些盲目追崇名校的人, 實則是對自己沒有信心, 所以要用學校的名氣來抬高自己身分。當然名校有它的好處, 在一個人材聚集的環境下, 學生能夠從朋輩身上學習, 這固然是好事, 但不一定沒有名氣的學校沒有出類拔萃的學生。加上音樂跟其他科目不同, 向一位好老師學習是最重要, 好老師不易找到, 著名的教授也不是跟每一個學生都合得來, 而且有很多鋼琴教授都愛發藝術家脾氣, 每星期跟這類老師上課也不好受。我的教授是一位非常仁慈的老伯伯, 而且教學經驗豐富, 有不少學生想成為他的學生但也不可以, 他的時間表已經編排得密痲痲, 教授願意收我為學生, 我其實是很幸運。

老父着我要知足。我現在已經讀大學, 又可以讀自己心儀的科目, 但以前中學的同學卻在準備明年的高考, 辛苦捱完高考又不一定考到大學, 即使入到大學, 也未必可以讀自己喜歡的科目。我不需要承受高考的壓力, 又可以在大學修讀自己喜歡的科目, 我不應該再抱怨學校有什麼不足之處。

做人要知足, 不要為了爭取更好的東西而忽略了自己所擁有的一切。世事沒有完美, 要學懂珍惜眼前的人和物。

這是我在今個暑假學會的人生道理。

筆記

印象中學會抄筆記應該是中一的事, 起初開學的時候老師在課堂上偶然會暂停一會, 讓我們抄完黑板上的東西才作講解, 後來大家適應了中一的學習模式, 老師便要我們邊聽邊抄。現在上到大學, 上課時不太需要抄筆記, 整個學期一個科目的筆記也只是數頁紙。

我沒有讀預科, 兩年的會考生涯算是最多筆記, 那時候我不太喜歡所修讀的科目, 加上已經決定了將來讀音樂, 我沒有很大決心要考取優異成績。那兩年可算是混混噩噩地過去, 上課時感到沉悶是經常發生的事, 既不可以睡覺, 又沒有什麼事可以做, 唯有靠抄筆記來打發時間, 我會刻意放慢抄筆記的速度, 又或者把筆記上的字體修飾得很端正, 這些都是極無聊的解悶方法, 但挺有用。有時候我也會感到內疚, 覺得自己浪費了很多時間, 但我又常常跟不上進度, 投入不到那些科目, 不過我需要會考證書來申請美國的大學, 所以無論如何也要捱過中四、五。

在學音樂上, 我個人覺得抄筆記沒有什麼用處。每次上大師班我都會見到不少人提着筆默默地寫, 而我總是什麼都不寫, 有時連筆記簿也不會拿出來, 一來我覺得那些筆記拿到回家後也是擱在一旁, 平時根本不會去翻看這些筆記, 最後大多數都是變成垃圾, 倒不如一開始便記在腦海裏, 我發現那是最有用的方法, 練琴時想起以前在大師班學過的東西便可以立即作嘗試, 省回抄和翻看筆記的時間。另外, 學音樂最重要是聆聽, 要學懂怎樣去聽才可以進步, 所謂的「聽」, 就是去聽每一個音的色彩、質感、當中的感覺等等, 還有作曲家想表達的感情...... 這是一個很複雜的步驟, 不但耳朵要對聲音很敏感, 而且要十分集中。正所謂「一心不能二用」, 抄筆記必定會分散了注意力, 那便不能夠「聽」得清楚, 不同類型的聲音當中的分別可能是很細微, 只是在落鍵的方法稍作改變已經會彈出不同的聲音, 聽上去可能是極小的分別, 卻可能會影響到整首樂曲的音樂表達。看着那些默默筆耕的人, 我只覺得可惜, 表面上他們像是收穫豐富, 帶着一頁頁的筆記離開, 但實則上他們可能沒有真正學到最重要的東西。

因此, 我選擇不寫筆記, 集中聽鋼琴師的講解和示範。

《The Dark Knight》. 《The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor》

一星期內看了兩齣電影, 分別是《The Dark Knight(蝙蝠俠 - 黑夜之神)》和《The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor(盜墓迷城3)》。

看《The Dark Knight》之前我完全沒有看過Batman的電影, 對故事中的人物毫無認識, 不過我也覺得《The Dark Knight》是一部水準很好的電影, 情節很緊湊, 兩個多小時內我都處於極緊張的狀態。Joker這人物心理很特別, 我花了不少時間才理解他究竟想要什麼, 他想要的是整個城市處於無政府狀態, 即是一片混亂。我最深刻的一幕是電影接近完結前兩艘船上的人在掙扎應否按下引爆器, 他們一方面很害怕自己會被炸死, 但又不忍心按下引爆器炸死對方, Joker一心以為兩方的人都會因為恐懼而爭先按下引爆器, 不過最後雙方都放棄了, 保住性命。那一幕令我很感動, 因為船上的人都很善良, 他們都不願意看着對方被炸死, 他們寧願一直在等, 最後對方在到了時限都沒有按下引爆器。這齣電影頗有哲理, 有些地方很值得觀眾思考, Joker固然是一個非常可惡的壞人, 但其實他是一個悲劇人物, 他的身世很可憐, 還有臉上那道疤痕, 種種原因令他變得暴戾和冷血, 即使是殺人的方法也特別殘忍, 他喜歡用刀, 只因為他想看到一個人死前最真實的表情。

另一部電影《The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor(盜墓迷城3)》也不錯, 故事背景是中國, 有一個鏡頭是長城, 景色很壯麗。唯一不滿意的地方就是部分起用的演員, 第一位是飾演郭明將軍的那位演員, 我不知道他叫什麼名字, 不過印象中好像在李連杰的其他電影見過他, 那位演員的樣子不難看得出他不是純中國人, 雖然郭明將軍不是主角, 但看着一個外表「鬼鬼地」的人飾演中國人的角色, 總覺得怪怪的。另一位就是飾演林的Isabella, 她的演出沒有問題, 不過她的英文讀音卻令我不禁皺眉頭。為了提升自己聽英文的能力, 在香港看電影時我不會看中文字幕, 逼自己集中聆聽對白, 雖然暫時不能夠仔細聽清楚每一個字, 但一般情況都能明白到整句的意思。看《The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor》聽其他演員的對白都沒有什麼問題, 唯獨是聽Isabella的英語對白感到有點吃力, 有好幾次我是聽不懂她在說什麼, 她的發音很奇怪, 所以每當她有對白的時候, 我都要看一下字幕, 否則我便不知道她在講什麼話。我知道Isabella讀書少, 為拍這部電影在英語下了不少苦功, 在短時間可以學到這程度其實已經是不錯, 但我會覺得導演可以起用英文較流利的女演員來飾演這角色。

單身

返回單身真好, 雖然暑假又是過着日夜顛倒的生活, 但是沒有約會, 我便留在家中練琴、上網和看電視, 間中燙衣服(因為母親大人不在香港)。不外出其實省回不少時間, 因為我發現每次逛街之後回到家中, 總是感到有點累, 然後練琴很難集中, 結果練了一會又不想練, 一共浪費了最少半天的時間。

這個月的練琴進度也過得去, 總算學完全首Rachmaninoff Paganini Rhapsody, 不過要背到這首樂曲卻是很吃力, 尤其是最後的數段變奏曲。上一次彈給教授聽應該是兩個半月前的事, 那是大考的時候, 但是只彈了主題和十段變奏曲。現在的目標是在暑假完結前把它背好。

上星期煲日劇《交響情人曲》, 我很羨慕女主角野田妹可以靠聆聽和看琴譜把樂曲記好, 假如我有這項才能就好了。哈哈。

為什麼?

為什麼Rachmaninoff的手掌這麼大, 可以彈十三度?

為什麼Rachmaninoff的和聲這麼複雜?

為什麼Rachmaninoff的作品這麼難記?

為什麼Rachmaninoff的Paganini Rhapsody技巧這麼困難?

「港女」

我是一個很落後的人, 對潮流用語的認識很少, 所以很多時候我不明白別人的說話, 又或者誤解了意思。我不太喜歡那些潮流用語, 所以沒有刻意去找出那些字詞的意思和用法, 直到現在, 我仍然不明白「屈機」的意思。

在縱多潮流用語中, 我比較熟悉的是「港女」一詞, 按詞面來看, 不難猜到它是跟香港女生有關, 但我也是在兩個月前在一位男生口中得知這詞話是帶有眨意, 大概是指缺點多多的香港女生, 例如經常要男朋友買名牌、總是要男生遷就自己等等。我不清楚「港女」實則是指什麼類型的女生, 不過放暑假時回香港, 我常常在網上看到這詞語, 而我也偶然找到一些網誌專門寫關於「港女」, 當然也少不了聽到男生在討論女生時用這「港女」來形容她們。

坦白說, 我非常不喜歡「港女」一詞, 也很討厭別人用這詞語來形容別人, 原因在於他們只懂得留意其他人的缺點, 然後大肆批評一番。有些人也許會覺得這些人的意見一針見血, 但我卻認為此舉表現出他們修養低。一個修養好的人是應該欣賞別人的優點和長處, 從中學習, 並非故意找出別人的不足之處作批評。世上沒有完美的人, 每個人總會有缺點, 在適當時候作出善意的批評那當然是好事, 但是不需要刻意去找出別人有什麼缺點, 而批評人家並不會令自己顯得比別人優越, 反而顯得自己修養低。

學習欣賞別人的優點也是一門學問。

夢想 . 現實

很多時候, 夢想和現實都是兩回事。

我不太喜歡自己的大學, 主要原因是我覺得讀書氣氛不夠好, 我主修的科目是鋼琴演奏, 一門比較特別的科目, 不需要讀很多書或寫論文, 但是要用很多時間練琴, 一年三百六十五日無休, 所以準確一點來說, 應該是練琴氣氛不夠好。當初選這間學校是因為我的教授, 之前暑假參加音樂營認識了他, 覺得他是一名很好的老教授, 母親也有同感, 於是她問教授我是否有能力考大學, 假如可以考進他任教的學校, 可否跟他學習, 意外地教授很支持我, 而我在音樂系的面試也不算是很正式, 就這樣, 今年一月我便成為了這所大學的學生。一個學期很快便過去了, 教授和他的太太待我很好, 很照顧我, 跟教授習琴也不錯, 在大學的第一個暑假便跟他去了兩個音樂營, 教授對我的表現也很滿意, 而整個學期我的讀書成績也不錯。

照道理, 我應該很滿意, 但我總覺得缺少了一些東西, 那就是鬥心。回想自己在過去一個的生活, 其實是挺頹廢, 真正用心練琴的日子不算多, 什至比我之前在香港讀書時少。我被這問題困擾了很久, 直至暑假時我才明白到問題所在, 那就是學習環境和氣氛。美國和香港的教育制度大有不同, 學生會選擇自己喜歡的科目, 所以音樂系每一個學生都很喜歡音樂, 但是主修演奏的學生會花多少時間在練琴上, 那又是另一回事, 我覺得學校除了個別數位學生之外, 一般學生不算是特別用功練琴。

我從小學到中學, 都是在家長眼中的「名校」讀書, 同學之間的競爭很大, 也許是我已經習惯了這種學習環境, 所以來到這大學, 心裏總覺很不太舒服。我中學時候才決定讀音樂, 起步比別人遲, 加上我打算完成學位課程一直深造, 所以當初選學校便沒有考慮那些音樂學院, 而選一些音樂系規模較小的大學(即是沒有什麼名氣的學校), 找一個好老師, 在幾年內打好根底, 畢業後才考音樂學院讀碩士。很美滿的計劃, 學期初聽到學系的高年级學生練一些很艱深的作品, 我便鼓勵自己要用功, 不過後來看到晚飯後回學校練琴的人越來越少, 我便開始泄氣, 我感到很迷失, 做事沒有幹勁。

我有想過轉校, 練好一套曲目轉音樂學院, 但是轉校有很多問題。首先, 我自問沒有良好的基礎, 有沒有能力考進去也是一個問題。之前在音樂營認識了一些音樂學院的學生, 他們告訴我考學校的「遊戲」其實是"50 % audition, 50% connection", 美國學生在報名前數個月要找音樂學院的教授上課, 確定了教授收他們為學生才申請學校, 然後面試。這是現實, 每年申請音樂學院的學生非常多, 當中有天份的人也不少, 但學位有限, 學校決定收錄哪一名學生, 便要看那些教授可以收多少名學生。我在connection這部分已經輸了, 彈琴又不是特別出色, 考到的機會率很低。第二個問題, 就是轉校其實是對我老師不敬, 我的教授不算是極著名, 但是他在教學上的成就是得到不少人的認同, 即使我幸運地考進音樂學院, 音樂這圈子很狹窄, 將來我參加比賽難免會碰到他。另外還有很多問题, 如學費會較昂貴和轉學分等問題。

我想轉校, 但現實不容許我這樣你, 很大機會要留在這間大學自完成學位課程。我很懷疑當初是我父母下錯決定, 選擇這所學校, 還是我自己的問题。

Summer

Done with the concert last night. It was quite exhausting to play in a concert that lasted for more than 1 hour. I took a really good rest today.

Finally I can get back to my solo pieces. I will have to finish learning the whole Rachmaninoff Paganini Rhapsody. Hopefully, I can memorise it as well. Also, prepare a few new pieces to play for my teacher when I go back to school next month. There are some other things that I need to go in the summer. The first one is probably buying new clothes. My clothes have become much smaller after being washed and dried in the machines in the USA. Also, I need to find some time to meet some old friends. Last but not least, I must throw away some useless stuff as my desk doesn't have much space left.

室樂

星期日從俄羅斯回來, 這幾天都很忙碌, 每天都要跟朋友Y綵排數小時, 很累。

室樂比獨奏辛苦得多, 加上我之前有三個多星期沒有跟朋友Y練習, 大家的演繹方法又有改變, 结果花了不少時間在討論意見, 討論完畢後又要實驗, 又沒有老師的指導, 有時候也會感到很沮喪。室樂最麻煩的地方在於每一個人的性格和對音樂的認真程度都不同, 演繹風格又不一樣, 而且合室樂最重要的是聆聽, 只有互相聽着對方才可以合得好, 不過很多人都做不到, 只顧着自己的部分, 不理會其他人, 朋友Y很多時候都不聽鋼琴的部分, 結果整首樂曲聽上去一團糟。在音樂上, 我一向追求完美, 有時候練習多次效果也是不理想我會很容易「忟憎」, 不過跟別人合奏我便要盡力保持冷靜, 否則只會浪費時間在吵架上。

離音樂會只有數天, 要盡能力做到最好。

俄羅斯簽證

昨天去俄羅斯領事館申請簽證, 由於音樂營遲遲沒有寄出「邀請信」, 而我星期五便會離開香港, 這令我只有數天時間去辦簽證, 而簽證一般要一星期才可以辦好, 我只能額外付錢辦「急證」, 承惠九百元。這實在是非常昂貴, 簽證只有效一次旅程, 倘若日後我想去俄羅斯, 又要再次付錢申請簽證, 「普通證」收費要四百元。

對俄羅斯領事館沒有什麼好感, 職員態度十分惡劣, 回答問題的語氣像在罵人。俄羅斯領事館的工作量可真是極少, 申請簽證的人不多, 昨天早上我去領事館時只有六、七人左右, 有些職員更是悠閒得坐在櫃台前發呆。 辦簽證既昂貴又效率低, 只是貼一張纸在護照裏也要一個星期, 申請簽證的人又少, 根本辦一份簽證不需要一星期這麼長時間, 但辦「急證」便要收取九百大元, 那真是搶錢, 而那些領事簡直是一群「懶鬼」。

星期五將會展開我的「音樂營之旅」, 第一個音樂營是在美國密蘇里(Missouri)舉行, 這是一個室樂音樂營, 我被編排了跟幾位學生合奏David Diamond Quintet in B minor for Flute, Strings Trio & Piano的第一樂章, 一首現代作品, 對David Diamond這位美國作曲家毫無認識。之前音樂營的職員把樂譜寄去我在美國的地址, 擾攘了數天, 結果要勞煩Director電郵樂譜給我, 他們預期學生在上星期二收到樂譜, 但是我星期六才收到, 我只有少於一星期的時間準備, 但是作品頗難彈, 希望可以在短時間把它練好。

這個音樂營完結後過兩天我將會去俄羅斯參加另一個音樂營, 這段時間我便會去新澤世(New Jersey)探望契媽, 然後前往俄羅斯聖彼得堡(St. Petersburg)。我從未去過俄羅斯, 這地方有着很濃厚的藝術氣息, 沒有記錯的話, 音樂營的其中一個節目會去看芭蕾舞劇, 俄羅斯的芭蕾舞很有名, 這是很難得的機會。

很期待去俄羅斯, 我要買俄羅斯娃娃(和魚子醬), 哈哈! :D

演奏會

前兩天, 拉大提琴的朋友Y說:「哈哈, 我們破了浸大記錄, 有勇氣在學校開演奏會。」

真的, 要在同輩面前演奏是需要很大的勇氣, 因為一般主修演奏的學生都不會同意其他人的演繹方法, 而且他們會將別人的演奏跟著名鋼琴家的彈法作比較, 所以大部分意見都是偏向反面的, 有些人品格修養差, 亳不留情地批評別人, 什至在數人家有多少個錯音。因此, 對於在同輩面前彈琴, 我一向都是可免則免, 不過對於別人的意見, 無論是好還是壞, 我都會樂意接納。

演奏會將會在七月九日在浸大LT3舉行, 我和朋友Y都很期待!

Summer Holiday

I must admit that I get lazier. I haven't updated here for nearly one month.

My first semester in college is over. I viewed my GPA two days ago and I got 3.71. It is quite impossible to get 4 because I can never score A for English. This is not my first language and the professor usually gives B+ only as my course focuses on composition. Still, I hope that I will get a higher GPA next semester. This will be a challenge for me as I will take more than 18 credit hours while the maximum is 20.

I have come back home for one week already. Perhaps it's because I lived alone for the past two months, I felt a bit strange when I arrived at home. There is so much freedom when living alone. I can do anything at any time. The most important thing is that no one controls my sleeping time. Nevertheless, I see my parents all the time and they push me to bed at around 12:30a.m. every night. Beyond doubts, I am not allowed to stay up late. I am afraid that I will gain weight during my stay in HK. There is good food everywhere. I eat more than before. Also, I sleep more many hours every day. People usually gain weight when they study abroad but it seems that my situation is the opposite.

The summer holiday will last for three months. I predict that it will be an exciting one. Firstly, I will go to two music camps. One in Missouri, USA and another one in St. Petersburg, Russia. Sadly, the procedure for applying a tourist visa to Russia is very complicated. Right now, I still haven't received the invitation for the visa while the camp will start on 17th June. St. Petersburg is a very nice place and I really want to go there. Besides that, Russia was the country where my favourite composer, Rachmaninoff was born. Just see how things work out.

大學生活

入大學以後一直過着「無王管」的生活, 養成了很多壞習慣。

壞習慣包括:
1. 日夜癲倒
2. 極度依賴咖啡
3. 食無定時
4. 經常以杯麵或微波爐食物代替正餐
5. 夜歸

一心想着來了美國讀書可以擺脫父母的管束, 怎料這幾個月反而要常常聽他們訓話, 原因只有一個:這些壞習慣會影響健康。

ROCK CHALK, JAYHAWK!!

KU won the national championship game!! The game was really breathtaking and impressive. After waiting for 20 years, KU brought the long-waited championship back. As a student of the university, I was so proud of the basketball team.

Both teams were very strong. It happened that each team gave shots alternately. As the game continued, Memphis was a few points ahead of KU. In the very last 10 seconds, everyone was so frustrated because Memphis was 3 points ahead of us. It was quite a hopeless situation. Making a 3-point shot was the only way to change the disappointing result. Suddenly, KU hit a 3-pointer with 2.1 seconds left in regulation and tied the score at 63. No one believed it when the ball hit the net. The scene was just wonderful! I had to say that it was so sudden. Even the coach and the members of our team could hardly believe it. As I watched the game in a house with a large group of people, the atmosphere was really strong. When the score was tied, my friends and I all shouted loudly and joyfully. Everyone in the house just jumped up and down with hyper. I still remember that my throat was really scratchy because of the prolonged shouting.

The game was moved to overtime. This 5 minutes duration was really crucial. KU did their very best and made a few shots in short time. The morale was excellent, and they did even better. It was really discouraging to Memphis and this lowered their morale. They didn't perform well. Finally, KU achieved a victory of 75-68.

There were good things about the opposite team. Yet, their free throw shots were quite bad. They missed some critical shots. All these cost a championship. This allowed KU to use fouling as the strategy to win the game.

After the basketball game, I rushed to Downtown with my friends. The whole street was emerged with people. Probably more than 90% of KU students were there. Almost everyone high-fived at each other. I could barely hear what other people said because it was so noisy. It was fun to feel the atmosphere of the people living in the town. I didn't enter the bars because they were all fully occupied. However, I got two glasses of alcoholic drinks at the house. The drink was a mixture of Vanilla Vodka, concentrated cranberry juice, sprite and water. Strangely, it tasted like cheesecake. I didn't know the ingredients before taking the first glass. It was the moment when I refilled the drink, I found that the Vanilla Vodka consists of 35% alcohol. My friend only added a small amount to the drink because of my young age. I didn't get drunk but I felt quite hot when taking the drink.

It was such a memorable evening! ROCK CHALK JAYHAWK!!

Final

I found that I have made a mistake. This evening's basketball match was only the semi-final, my school vs North Caroline. Anyway, my school won and we got 18 points ahead the opposite team! It was my first time to watch a basketball game. I only watched the 2nd quarter but it was really exciting. Everyone shouted and jumped whenever the team made a good shot. Of course, they rushed to downtown after the game.

Next Monday night, the game will be my school against Memphis. Classes may be cancelled on Tuesday if they win.:D

Go, Jayhawk!!

Jayhawk

My college has a very strong basketball team. Most American basketball fans know my school just because of the team. Ironically, I am now studying in this college and I know nothing about the basketball team. I never care about their games and results. I don't even know that blue is the colour of ur team. See how dumb I am.

There was a match on Sunday night. My college got into final 4. Everyone got really crazy. I heard people shouting when I went to bed. At that time, it was about 2a.m. already. I couldn't imagine what had happened in downtown. The next morning, there were many students absent because they were too excited to sleep or they couldn't get up early.

My classmate told me that there will be a game this Saturday. The team will become the national champion if they win. It will be a piece of good news. Not many Hong Kong people have heard of my college though it is in a fine position in the national rankings. Some of its academic programs are the best among all US universities. If the basketball team wins the game, I will be able to tell people about the national championships when they ask me about my college.

Jayhawk! :D

第一次(壞事)

寫完好事, 便寫壞事。這次旅程, 發生了一些令我很生氣的事。

從香港回去芝加哥那程機延遲了, 原因是要等候從其他地方來香港轉機的乘客, 結果飛機遲了半個小時才起飛。我在芝加哥原本有兩個小時的轉機時間, 如果我步伐快, 時間剛剛好, 但是遲了起飛, 只能寄望機師加快飛行速度。可惜, 抵達芝加哥的時候, 離下一班機的起飛時間不足一個半小時, 下機之後急步跑去移民局清關, 然後等候領取行李。之前在香港機場check-in時, 地勤職員在我的行李扣上"Priority"牌, 她說這是對「地位較高」的乘客的優待, 搬行李的工人會先拿出這些行李, 令乘客可以較早取回行李。我耐心地等, 但一直沒有見到自己的行李, 地勤職員沒有騙我, 起初出來的行李確是有"Priority"牌, 行李陸陸續續出來, 就連沒有"Priority"牌也差不多全都出來了, 但是我還未取回行李。我開始焦急起來, 因為只剩下半個小時左右, 同時也有數位商務艙乘客跟我一樣還未領回行李。等到最後一刻, 忽然有幾件扣着"Priority"牌的行李出來, 其中兩件是屬於我, 看看手錶, 尚餘ニ十五分鐘, 再沒有時間猶疑, 急忙取了行李跑到收集轉機行李的角落。

ORD是一個「大站」, 每天有無數旅客在這機場轉機, 也有極多航班出入, 可想而知這角落要收集大量行李, 所以我一向都覺得它的凌亂程度絕不遜於亂葬崗。找到負責搬行李的職員, 簡短告訴他我的情形, 着他迅速把行李送上行李輸送帶, 他看着航班時間表, 對我說:「你趕不及這班機, 不如乘搭下一班飛機, 你問問地勤職員怎麼辦。」問地勤職員, 他的答案是全日的由ORD往KCI航班都滿座, 即使是翌日的航班, 只剩下晚上八時那一班有空位, 如果我不介意行李延遲, 可以盡量趕這班機。呆了一呆, 我立即丟下行李給那位負責搬行李的職員拚命地走, 臨走時他拋下了一句"Good Luck"。閘口跟這角落相隔兩個terminal, 乘搭那些火車也要數分鐘的時間, 到了那個terminal, 下車後又在跑, 相信沿途有不少人被我撞倒, 但我實在無時間停下來道歉, 匆忙過完security check後只有＋分鐘。那一刻心情很焦急, 但我深信自己可以趕得及, 千辛萬苦在起飛時間前五分鐘趕到閘口。

跑得上氣不接下氣, 心裡暗自慶幸自己趕得到, 向閘口職員遞上boarding pass。怎料, 接着的是更差的事。閘口的門已關上了, 那職員看到我的boarding pass, 冷冷地說：「飛機走了。」我立刻問：「什麼？不是2:55嗎? 現在只是2:50。」他答道:「閘口會在起飛時間前十分鐘關上, 你應該早一點來到。」聽到「你應該早一點來到」這話, 加上他那種「Who cares?」的態度, 真是很生氣, 這時有其他人趕到, 原來他們也是從香港出發, 在ORD轉機往KCI, 計算我在內一共有八位乘客, 那職員只能打發我們去服務櫃台。這兩家人都心倩很差, 我也不例外, 說話語氣也不禁變差, 板着臉問一位地勤職員怎麼辦, 他說唯一可以做的就是把我名字放在stand-by list, 有空位便讓我上機。我反問:「那就是說下一班沒有位, 我便要一直在等?」他回答：「假如今天的全部航班都沒有空位讓你上機, 航空公司會提供洒店。」我不禁在笑：「我明天一早要上學, 那我只能等stand-by。」那刻心裡有多罵人的說話, 但我在機場跑完一趟後已經無力氣跟他爭論, 呼吸還未回復正常。不過離開服務櫃台時, 心情真是糟透, 我實在不願意要等到翌日才可以回KCI, 同時也對航空公司＋分失望, 需要準時的時候又延遲, 現在只需等候數分鐘卻在「扮準時」, 真可笑, 而且有八名乘客, 當中有名幾個月的嬰兒, 更何沉我們根本沒有遲到, 只是飛機提早離開, 連累我們白跑一趟。

我相信航空公司內部可以查到所有乘客的行程, 他們也可以找出哪一航班延遲, 從這件事不難看得出航空公司內部溝通嚴重不足, 大家都在同一個機埸工作, 雖然是不同terminal, 但是以現今的科技, 內部之間要傳遞一個簡短的訊息並不困難。拖着沉重的步伐到下一班機的閘口, 致電回家訴苦, 說着說着, 忍不住哭起來, 活了＋七年, 那是我第一次因為極度憤怒而哭, 母親還以為我是害怕得哭起來, 但我絕不是害怕, 因為我知道自己一定可以回到KCI, 只是什麼時候可以回去是未知數, 她着我再去問有沒有其他更快的方法, 例如先到其他地方然後才轉機到KCI。又到另一個服務櫃台問, 地勤職員告訴我可以先去Charlotte才去KCI, 不過全部航班都滿座了, 她也告訴我航空公司把我的名字放在stand-by list的最前幾位, 很大機會能夠上到下一班飛機。沒有其他辨法, 只好在閘口乖乖地等, 我不敢到處逛, 因為stand-by是先到先得, 職員喊名字兩次沒有人應的話, 便會把座位給予名單上下一位乘客。沒多久, stand-by list有了, 一共有三十二名乘客, 但只有七個空位, 我的名字放在第二, 可以上到下一班飛機, 心情總算好轉, 最後比原本計劃遲了兩個小時回到KCI, 但總好過滯留ORD。

這是我人生第一次趕不到飛機。也就是因為趕不到原本的航班, 我錯過了一埸visiting artist recital, 真可惜。

第一次(好事)

回程時經歷了許多我人生中的第一次, 有好事, 也有壞事。先在這裡寫好事。

香港沒有直機去KS, 我必須在Chicago O'Hare轉機, 然後乘內陸機到KCI。在香港Check-in的時候, 航空公司職員問我有沒有興趣在從香港到芝加哥那程機轉坐business class, 惠$5940。由於我的機票是用飛行里數換回來的, 所以upgrade到business class也沒有飛行里數可以加, 起初我和母親都覺得不划算, 倒不如省回$5940, 但是父親卻提出upgrade, 原因是我回到美國翌日早上便要上課, 他希望我能夠在機上有充足的休息, 而且飛行時候接近十五小時, business class的坐位和食物都比較好, 所以$5940也是一個合理的價錢。就是這樣, 我被upgrade到business class, 而座位位於飛機上層。航空公司在機場有一個lounge, 用來招待business class和first class的旅客。人生第一次乘business club, 當然把握機會到那個lounge參觀一下, 有很多食物可選擇, 地方很寬敞, 環境不錯。

Business class的確是比economy class舒適很多, 座位＋分寬闊, 椅背的角度可以調校至接近180度, 也有腳凳, 而且每一個座位都有一個小型電視螢幕, 食物也較為好吃。這程長途機, 我平常多睡了。也許是因為從小到大都是來economy class, 這次乘business class不太習慣, 畢竟身份不同, 總覺得跟那些衣着光鮮的商界人士坐在一起有點奇怪, 就把這次長途機當作是一次人生經驗。

香港機場的lounge:














Business Class:

中文

只是去了美國兩個半月, 短時間內中文退步不少, 有時候跟香港的朋友在MSN聊天感到有點無奈, 因為有些英文生字不懂, 想用中文表達, 提着手寫板的筆, 卻又發現自己忘記那些中文字怎樣寫, 只好把不同的部首胡亂拼拼湊湊, 然後選一個比較像樣的字。

放假比上學更忙碌, 每天都外出跟親朋戚友吃飯, 累死了。前天更回到舊校幫朋友伴奏, 晚上又出席另一位朋友的生日派對, 行程編排得密麻麻。再過兩天又要返回美國, 有少許捨不得離開香港, 始終這是我的家, 我在這裡找到一份親切感, 但是我還是比較喜歡在美國讀書, 也許是因為我的大學位於中部的一個小鎮, 環境較為優美和寧靜, 對練琴和讀書有很大幫助, 而且小鎮的空氣清新, 令人感到精神抖擻。

剛剛發現寫中文也不是我想像般差。

Home Sweet Home

I feel really happy to be at home, a very familiar and comfortable place. To my surprise, I don't have much homework to do. Spring break is the time for me to take a good sleep since I have been struggling with assignments and papers for the past few days.

Going to enjoy my holiday in HK.

Scholarship audition

(3) Last saturday morning, I went to Missouri to attend a scholarship audition. It was an open competition for performance majors under the age of 25; organized by an international music fraternity.

Contestants had to play two contrasting pieces and my reportoire included J.S.Bach Prelude & Fugue in D major, WTC I and Liszt Hungarian Rhapsody No.6. Since there were many students joining the audition, the organization required each of us to play for 8 minutes only. It was not tough but challenging. The duration was really short. In other words, you had to make good use of that 8 minutes to show your ability to the judges. There was no time to warm-up. I was satisfied with my own performance and this had never happened before. At last, I didn't get the scholarship. However, I am looking forward to receiving the comment sheets.

The audition was held in a college. The campus was quite beautiful.

A war

(2) Finally a war started between me and my roomate. This war broke out on thursday night. Her boyfriend came to visit her. Same as usual, they made lots of noises and it was so annoying. Later, that guy took a nap and soon he began to snore. It was after 11pm already and he didn't have the intention to leave at all. I kept on waiting for the guy to leave and my limit was 12am. This caused me lots of inconvenience because I couldn't take a shower until he had left.

Then at 11:30pm, I asked my roomate, "When will your friend leave? He isn't going to stay overnight, is he?" She answered me coldly, "I don't know. Probably not so soon." It was actually a very dumb question because I was sure that he wouldn't leave. My purpose was to hint to her that I didn't want that guy to stay overnight as I had talked to her about that before. 15 minutes later, I asked my roomate again, "Is that possible to ask you friend to leave by 12am? I would feel uncomfortable if he stays overnight again." This time, her attitude was even worse. She replied, "Well, there's no point that I need to ask him to leave. Non-residents are allowed to stay overnight. If you feel uncomfortable, you shouldn't have signed the lease and moved into here." I frowned and then smiled secretly because she confronted me with the lease. Yet, she didn't read the lease carefully enough. I took a breath and said, "You are right. But there is another rule saying that this is not allowed if it causes me inconvenience and disturbance. I don't have the lease right now. We can go downstairs to the frontdesk to seek for advice." My roomate chose to turn a deaf ear to what I said and she didn't even turn around to look at me. She switched off the television and went to sleep with the guy. Going downstairs to the frontdesk was my last resort. Her irrespectfulness really got on my last nerve. I went to the frontdesk at once.

The RAs followed me back to my room. One of them woke my roomate up and talked to her. At first, my roomate was very conceited and laughed coldly when the RA told her that her boyfriend had to leave. She re-used the rule of "Non-residents are allowed to stay overnight." The RA then further explained the rule that I followed to her. Within a few seconds, her triumphant smile faded and she was speechless except for waking her boyfriend up. After the group of people had left, she stared at me furiously. Undoubtedly, I must move out as soon as possible. I had no idea whether this girl would do something to take revenge on me.

Next morning, I requested for moving to another room. Luckily, there was an empty room available. This rarely happened but the two girls living in this room had moved out. With no hesitancy, I packed all my things and moved out. Now, I have a very spacious double room with two beds, two desks and two wardrobes. There is no roomate. No more TV noises, kissing sounds or loud music inside my room. I can play all kinds of music at any time I want.

First concert in college

A few memorable and unforgettable things happened last week. Unfortunately, I had no time to write about them as I had to work on a paper.

(1) My first concert in this college. Being a music student, I have to join an ensemble (choir or orchestra) for credits and I play violin in the orchestra. There was a concert last Tuesday and the programme included Wagner Prelude to Die Meistersinger von Nurnberg , Weber Bassoon Concerto and Mussorgsky/Ravel Pictures at an Exhibition.

The concert was quite successful because everyone worked really hard. The soloist for the Weber was a graduate student and she played really well. I rarely listen to bassoon music and after this concert, I find that the sound of bassoon is very lovely. It is quite mild and the pitch is neither too high nor too low.

My favourite work is definitely Pictures. Originally, it was a piano solo work composed by Mussorgsky and then Ravel arranged it for orchestra. The orchestration was impressive but quite tough for woodwind and brass players. There are a few spots featuring solos of brass instruments such as the trumpet solo in the promenade I, tuba solo in the Oxen etc. There is also an important spot for saxophone solo in. Pictures is a really difficult piece. Not only each part is not easy at all, it is so hard to make every part sound together. For strings, there are two fast movements that require shifting between pizzicato and arco consecutively. The ending was breathtaking. It was full of power and passion. I can still clearly remember how the very last chord echoed in the hall and then the applause joined it.

The orchestra will have concert again in late April. The reportoire will include Berlioz Roman Carnaval Overture, Mendelssohn Violin Concerto and Tchaikovsky Symphony No.5. Such an exciting programme and I am looking forward to it.

An evening in the music department

The school of music and dance consists of 5 floors and 5th floor is the place where all practice rooms are located. It has a L-shaped design with about 100 practice rooms in total.

Last night, I went to practise violin and piano after a concert. There were only a few students practising since most people went out to have fun on weekends. Everything was fine except for bumping into a stranger along the corridor. He seemed to be quite high and he sang while walking. I first found an empty room and went to the locker to get my violin. And I saw him again but I didn't really pay much attention to him. After practising the violin, I put back my violin. There was a strong smell of alcohol in the corridor. I saw the stranger walking along the corridor. To be more precise, he was wandering, not walking. At that moment, I started to feel skeptical of this person as I had never met him before. There are lots of students in music department. Of course, it is impossible to know them all but I can recognise most of them but not this stranger. Perhaps this person was drunk and he just entered the building randomly?

I felt a bit afraid but I still went to practise piano. I stayed alert to the sound coming from other rooms because I felt more secure if there were some other students. Usually, I leave the department at around 11pm and some students are still practising. But yesterday was saturday and people left earlier than usual. The floor was totally silent by 10:30pm. This dead silence made me shiver and I immediately grabbed my bag and left the department. It was mainly because I subconsciously believed that the stranger was drunk and I had no idea whether he was still on the floor. No one else was inside the music department and in case the stranger misbehaved, nobody would come if I needed help. Thinking of this possible consequence of practising for a bit longer, I decided to leave as soon as I could.

It was my first time to walk so fast in the music department despite for nearly being late for classes on weekdays.

Food & Music

I played Bach and Liszt for my teacher yesterday. He used a very interesting simile to compare the music of different stylistic periods.

"You need to have lots of characters when playing Liszt. It is not right if you just follow the score. Just like, um..... in Hong Kong, you have goose, right? And there are other food such as carrots, chicken etc and you have to choose what to eat. Unlike Bach or Mozart, you have to look carefully what the composer has written on the score. It is just like you eat what you are served. You have no choice."

An impression on college

Time takes the bullet train noiselessly. It is going to be week 5 of this semester next Monday. Looking back my first month in college, it has been filled with ups and downs.

I didn't study A-Level. My academic level is around form 5. Usually, form 5 graduates attend community colleges and then transfer to universities. Yet, I go to a university directly. Most universities in the US require freshman and sophomore students to take English class. Among all the subjects that I take, freshman English is definitely one of the toughest subjects. Overall, it is English course for local students and the standard is much higher than that of HK. We have to read very often and write papers. It takes me ages to do reading because I need to look up words in the dictionary from time to time. The topics of the papers are usually about social issues. My first paper is about global warming and the one that I am working on currently is about the conflicts of education in the USA. I can still vividly remember how frustrated I felt when reading the syllabus. The requirement for the paper is 3 to 4 pages. Later, when I wrote the first paper, it was not as much as I expected. It is because of the format of college paper which is double-spacing everything with a header on the first page. I wrote around 1000 words at last but I only wrote 300 words when I was in form 5.

Another subject is music theory. I have theory class every day and we are given lots of homework and tests. Frankly, this subject is pretty challenging. I skipped theory I and I went to theory II after coming to this school. I must perform well in this subject. If not, I won't be able to take musicology class next semester.

Going to audition for a scholarship two weeks later. I really need to spend more time on piano practice.

Masterclass

A very famous pianist and teacher, Professor Zitta Zohar holds masterclasses at my school these two days. I was very lucky that I had a chance to play Liszt Hungarian Rhapsody No.6 for her.

Usually, masterclasses are held in a hall. Yet, Professor Zohar's masterclass is held in a small room. There are a few good things to hold a masterclass in a small room. One reason is that most students tend to feel nervous when playing on stage and besides, the teacher help you polish the piece in front of lots of people. This is tough because all the audience put their attention on you. Sometimes, you may want to work on the things taught by the masterclass teacher but you are not able to do it because of the nervouness. You will probably feel awful and this will be even worse if the masterclass teacher is mean. Besides, if a masterclass is held in a hall, the audience rarely ask questions because they are not supposed to do that. It happens that it is like spoon-feeding in which the student works on the piece with the teacher while the others just sit and listen.

Professor Zohar prefers teaching in a small room because she likes to work on details. Namely, to have a lesson with the student. This afternoon, my professor, another professor and his wife came to the class. During the one hour class, the two professors raised questions occasionally. They were not trying to challenge Professor Zohar but to share their different ideas. The learning atmosphere was very good because everyone was so devoted into the class. For me, I couldn't feel that the masterclass teacher was "teaching" at all. Instead, it was like a discussion. On piano playing, there are many possible hand movements to play the same notes. Every pianists have different hand size, flexibility and shape and we don't play with the exact hand motions. We discussed different hand movements and then tried to figure out which one was better.

It was such a wonderful experience. Participating in a masterclass is quite boring for the audiences (if it is held in a hall). However, today's masterclass was definitely exhilarating. Though I was not satisfied with my playing, I still enjoyed the lesson very much. I was not nervous but I did feel insecure because I only practised the piece for about one week and then I had to play it in a masterclass. Professor Zohar worked on the piece with me in a very fine way and her suggestions were very helpful. She explained everything clearly whenever I asked her questions. No wonder she is so popular among students.

A parcel

I feel happy every time I receive a parcel from my family. This morning, I got a parcel again. There were lots of food, two red packets and a cute teddy bear in Chinese costumes.


I am thinking how much time it will take for me to eat all the food. This photo only shows the categories of food. For some of the snacks, my mom has sent me a few packets.


Mrs Fields cookies and the fluffy teddy bear. Sadly, the box can only fit in two pieces of cookies. I have to remind myself not to eat all of them in one time.


I love the biscuits and the box. The box looks so ellegant.


Red packets!

Roomate

The first two days of school were not bad. However, these two weeks were completely a nightmare to me. There were lots of assignments and quizzes. Homework seemed to be endless. Besides, my first piano lesson with the professor was not very good. I got very frustrated and stressed and my parents were so concerned about me.

I didn't feel happier until yesterday. I had my second piano lesson and it was great. The professor told me lots of things to interpret the 3rd mvt of Beethoven Sonata Op.109. My professor performed Beethoven Sonata Op.109 many years ago and I was so impressed by his thorough understanding of the work. Yet, at the end I had to give up playing this piece because the professor thought that it is too difficult for me. I got to understand why my first piano lesson was a bit disappointing. The reason is that I was the last student on that day. Teaching students for hours is definitely not en easy job for my 6X years old professor. He didn't speak much during the lesson. Meanwhile, I was the first student yesterday and he taught me many things. I discussed with him about an audition for a scholarship and he was so enthusiastic about it. The audition required two contrasting works, one Baroque or Classical composition and one Romantic, Impressionistic or Modern composition. I decided to play Bach Prelude and Fugue and Liszt Hungarian Rhapsody. I opted for doing an old piece because I was not confident in refining and memorising the Liszt Paganini Etude within one month. Besides, I performed the Liszt Hungarian Rhapsody before and I knew what I needed to improve.

My roomate doesn't know how to respect the others at all. She keeps on doing something that bothers me a lot. Everytime, I just turn a deaf ear or a blind eye to it. It is because I don't want to have any quarrels with her. However, this morning, beyond doubts, I couldn't just remain silent anymore. Her boyfriend stayed overnight in our room but she didn't tell me before that. She went out quite late last night and I didn't expect her to come back. After I had fallen asleep, I barely heard the sound of opening a door. I was too tired to take a glance at her at that time. Nevertheless, I never expected that she would bring her boyfriend to sleep in our room because he didn't make any noise. At the middle of the night, I was waken up by loud snores. It was so strange because my roomate didn't snore. I couldn't see anything since it was too dark. Then I went back to sleep. This morning, I heard a male voice when I got up. I immediately looked round and I saw my roomate and her boyfriend lying on the bed. That was getting on my very last nerve. I couldn't stand a stranger of opposite sex staying in my room overnight, especially I was not told about it. In no doubt, it was my roomate's problem and she didn't respect me at all. Indeed, every time her boyfriend came to our room, they made so much noise which disturbed me a lot. They kissed loudly and turned up the volume of the TV even when I was doing assignments. And I couldn't take a shower as the door of the bathroom can't be locked from inside. Every time I told myself to bear them. But having a male sleeping in my room is beyond my tolerance. I talked to my roomate after the guy had left. She just said, "Ok." I had no idea if she would listen to me. Just hope that this will not happen again.

New school life

School started on thursday and I moved into the dorm the night before.

I live in a double room and my roomate is an American girl. I can't say whether I like her or not because our communication is almost none. She rarely stays in her room. I have lived in the dorm for three days already but every night I slept alone. She always goes out late and she just chooses not to come back if her friends don't give her a ride. To be honest, I prefer not seeing her in the room. My roomate has a television and she loves to turn up the volume. It is annoying to me as I am very sensitive to loud sound. Even when we are both in our room, we don't talk to each other. Our conversations are only limited to "hi" and "bye". If she doesn't make any noise, I may forget about her presence. I have heard of many cases of roomate problems before. Yet, for my case, we have no arguments because we just don't chat.

Living in dorm is acceptable. The food is edible and I manage to eat much food every meal. However, my dorm is a private one and everyone knows that it is a "party dorm". My room is located opposite to the elevator and it is very noisy. I can hear people shouting or banging the door in the middle of the night.

I still haven't ompletely adjusted to the American English. For the past two days, I was lost during classes sometimes, especially I came to school in the spring semester which was the middle of a school year. I felt upset on the first day of classes because I didn't know anyone in the class and I couldn't seek for any help. Fortunately, on the second day, I met some a few freshmen and schoolmates and they were very nice and helpful. And I started to enjoy my school life in university.

Orientation (2)

One thing that the USA required all the international students to do is to have a tuberculosis (TB) screening. For the health centre at my school, they use TB Gold blood test instead of X-ray as the TB test.

In my memory, it was my first time to take a blood test. That was definitely a "disaster". The foreigners always think that I am really skinny. On the day, when the nurse pulled up the sleeves of my T-shirt, she immediately said, "Oh gosh! Such a tiny hand!" She then tied my upper arm of my left hand with a rubber band in order to engorge the vein. However, my vein didn't bulge out and the nurse could hardly see the blood vessel. Then she tried with my right arm and it was slightly better. A very small blood vessel appeared. Again, the nurse said, "And such a tiny vein!" Finally she injected the syringe into the really tiny vein. I didn't look at the syringe and I didn't know what was happening until I suddenly felt great pain. I started to wonder if there was something wrong because there was also another student in the same room and I found that her blood was drawn within a few seconds while mine took so much time. I asked the nurse, "Done?" I turned around and the I saw the nurse frowning. She murmured, "I'm sorry, honey... I know that's not nice but your blood has stopped coming out and I only got a few drops...." She started to draw as much as blood as she could as she wanted to prevent me from taking the blood test again. It got really painful and I almost wanted to yell. I ddin't measure the time that the syringe was injected to my vein but I estimated it to be around 30 seconds. I suffered and at the same time, the nurse was having a hard time too. It was worse that I was asked to take the blood test again. I was then taken to the laboratory. The staff of the laboratory let me lie on a very comfortable sofa. This time she could get an adequate amount of blood. Afterwards, she gave me a few kinds of cartoon bandages to choose from. They looked really cute actually but I thought that I was too old to get a bandage with a cartoon character on it. Therefore I answered, "Uh... I think I prefer the normal bandage..." At last, she did give me a normal bandage but she drew a rabbit on it......

My right arm was quite painful throughout the whole day. There was a bruise with two "holes" on it. To some extent, I really looked like a drug addict. I have never imagined that taking blood test is totally an "nightmare" to me.

Orientation (1)

First post in 2008.

I can hardly believe that I have been in the USA for one week already. The semester break still hasn't ended and school will start on next thursday. We had orientation programmes for the past few days. Before I went to the USA, I always thought that the orientation programmes in the USA universities are very crazy. However, when I attended the orientation at my school, I found that it was not too bad. We had lots of things to do every day and they were not very exciting.

There were many students from China. Probably more than 1/3 of the orientation participants were Chinese students. I could hear Mandarin all the time. On the first two days, I felt quite happy to meet so many Chinese students. However, later time, I got to feel a bit annoyed because they didn't talk in English at all. The main reason was that their English standard was lower than other international students. They preferred making friends with students from their own country and of course, they communicated in Mandarin. I found that my Mandarin has improved a lot, but not my English. It was really ridiculous. Sometimes, the mainland students didn't understand what the speaker said and they asked me to translate for them. I never thought that I had a chance to be my mainland friends' "interpreter". That was another type of language exercise for me.